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flatmate beef
Some of the mates that reside in this flat aren’t mates. And rightly so. To clarify, I’m not the problem; I didn’t bring this beef. The thing with house shares is their unpredictable nature. This flat has the potential to be a great place to live, nice people, nice area but one tenant…
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I need a pocket pet
You know what I mean, a pet that I can take to the office. Keep him in my pocket, share my lunch with him – all that jazz
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Ignorant bliss
lay on the floor, cat lay on my chest. I’m stroking him, telling him how good his life is. How he’ll never have a mortgage, never crash a car, never break someone’s heart, he’s never been broke and how he’s completely oblivious to all of this. Ignorant bliss. Which got me thinking, with…
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a love story
men cherish compliments like shinies off that show what was it called The Shiny Show – CBeebies sometimes the emotional equivalent of a ball of scrunched up tinfoil is all a man needs to find love I once got dangerously close to falling for a girl in the smoking area of a…
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frosty
I have a cold Which I think peaked at a fever but I’m doing good now Woke up last night in the middle of the battle, my antibodies vs whatever I’d managed to catch. I was 1000 degrees and felt like death, all in aid of giving my immune system the energy it needed to…
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stuff
From 10 to 14 I played minecraft religiously, way before all this kids Microsoft bollocks. Propper minecraft with the lads. From 14 to 22, no minecraft. I mean I had it but kids play minecraft and you’re an adult. Then out of no where minecraft is just back in your life like a clingy ex…
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magic stars
people try and bribe you with cash but I swear, a discreetly offered pack of rainbow drops and i’m anyones you can’t put a price on unexpected rainbow drops. put your money away mate, head for the corner shop and pick me up something I can work with you know what i’m saying? amateurs…
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men cry it’s alright
Dream – Rufus’s last day. Took him for a big walk then we got home and we’re playing and this like priest came in. I explained how it’s a sad day because we think it’s his last and well the priest didn’t flinch, just kept playing with Rufus who was ecstatic that someone had entered…
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i’m the tenth dentist
The thing with roaming around is no bed, no shower. I’m not much of an online dating guy, isn’t my style BUT tinder does have its uses. So I’m a mess yeah my hairs all over the place I look like a refugee if I was a dog they’d make one of those YouTube videos…
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9 out of 10 dentists agree
Rufus (dog) suffers from awful separation anxiety. He’s always moaning and freaking out when someone he knows walks off without him. I’ve chalked it up to his shitty understanding of time. I don’t think dogs get time like humans. Unfortunately for Rufus, lots of the people he loves leave sooner or later. His first owner…