• Its straight up suicide

    So we’re gonna do it anyway Adios fuckers

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  • Army bag

    As a wee little human, I used to run away, a lot. Here’s me, first day of school. Don’t ask why I had to wear a shirt and tie to primary school, idk either. LOOK HOW HIGH MY SOCKS ARE. Smart little chap i’ll give him that. So running away, I love finding people who did the same because we…

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  • flatmate beef

    Some of the mates that reside in this flat aren’t mates. And rightly so. ‍ To clarify, I’m not the problem; I didn’t bring this beef. ‍ The thing with house shares is their unpredictable nature. This flat has the potential to be a great place to live, nice people, nice area but one tenant…

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  • I need a pocket pet

    You know what I mean, a pet that I can take to the office. Keep him in my pocket, share my lunch with him – all that jazz

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  • Ignorant bliss

    lay on the floor, cat lay on my chest. ‍ I’m stroking him, telling him how good his life is. How he’ll never have a mortgage, never crash a car, never break someone’s heart, he’s never been broke and how he’s completely oblivious to all of this. Ignorant bliss. ‍ Which got me thinking, with…

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  • a love story

    men cherish compliments like shinies off that show what was it called ‍ ‍The Shiny Show – CBeebies ‍ sometimes the emotional equivalent of a ball of scrunched up tinfoil is all a man needs to find love ‍ I once got dangerously close to falling for a girl in the smoking area of a…

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  • frosty

    I have a cold Which I think peaked at a fever but I’m doing good now Woke up last night in the middle of the battle, my antibodies vs whatever I’d managed to catch. I was 1000 degrees and felt like death, all in aid of giving my immune system the energy it needed to…

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  • stuff

    From 10 to 14 I played minecraft religiously, way before all this kids Microsoft bollocks. Propper minecraft with the lads. From 14 to 22, no minecraft. I mean I had it but kids play minecraft and you’re an adult. Then out of no where minecraft is just back in your life like a clingy ex…

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  • magic stars

    people try and bribe you with cash but I swear, a discreetly offered pack of rainbow drops and i’m anyones ‍ you can’t put a price on unexpected rainbow drops. put your money away mate, head for the corner shop and pick me up something I can work with you know what i’m saying? amateurs…

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  • men cry it’s alright

    Dream – Rufus’s last day. Took him for a big walk then we got home and we’re playing and this like priest came in. I explained how it’s a sad day because we think it’s his last and well the priest didn’t flinch, just kept playing with Rufus who was ecstatic that someone had entered…

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