It’s been a minute
Bought a new phone. For a techy guy, there’s nothing I hate more than having to buy a new civilian device. Just bought the best Samsung available, as I do every year. Turns out a lot has changed. This thing is massive and comes with a fucking pen. I put tape over my cameras bc GCHQ has upped their game, this silly slab of glass has more cameras than I have tape which was an inconvenience right off the bat. Phone company caught me cloning my SIM, tut tut.
Best thing in the world is black coffee and orange juice. Makes my taste buds tingle with joy. It’s the kinda call your mum and tell her you won’t be home feeling. Wondered if I could mix them together for the same result, I can’t. Shits nasty. I’ll tape a carton to a thermos. OR get Willy Wonker on it, use some of that bubblegum smart tech.
I have my bike back in London. After a long separation, my best buddy is back in my life, looking better than ever. He really is fucking gorgeous. Life changer. Matt with his bike is a force to be reckoned with.
Default device auto-correct is coded to take the first letter you type as gospel and just deal with whatever comes after. I’m a fast texter so often the first letter is the fuck up, not the rest. This is getting really frustrating and as much as I’d like to spend time learning words I canny spell, I don’t have time for such shannanagons.
In other news, I’m being taken to court for something so small I could make go away with less than 10 clicks online but I wanna show up in a massively oversized suit looking like a kid dressing up in their parent’s clothes, wearing some sort of hat and maybe even with ankle and wrist cuffs to baffle the judge. I’ll have to take a packed lunch. I don’t wanna take the piss but the idea of me munching my sandwiches sipping a juice box halfway through the hearing is the kind of scenes I live for.
Russians have granted Edward Snowden immunity. This, this kinda shit was what the blog used to be all about. I’ll do some reading and put a post together with my views, ideas and accompanying song.
Told M###### this week’s song would be Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go but I lied, she’ll forgive me.
Song of the goddamn week