• Its straight up suicide

    So we’re gonna do it anyway Adios fuckers


  • Army bag

    As a wee little human, I used to run away, a lot. Here’s me, first day of school. Don’t ask why I had to wear a shirt and tie to…


  • flatmate beef

    Some of the mates that reside in this flat aren’t mates. And rightly so. ‍ To clarify, I’m not the problem; I didn’t bring this beef. ‍ The thing with…


  • concern

    Airports are really becoming the bane of my life. I shouldn’t worry about them, to be honest I wouldn’t call it worry. It’s just concern. I’m concerned that they aren’t…


  • I need a pocket pet

    You know what I mean, a pet that I can take to the office. Keep him in my pocket, share my lunch with him – all that jazz


  • quantum

    The MoD has got their hands on a quantum computer, courtesy of our friends over at ORCA Computing. This is a game-changer, yet it isn’t getting too much exposure in…


  • Ignorant bliss

    lay on the floor, cat lay on my chest. ‍ I’m stroking him, telling him how good his life is. How he’ll never have a mortgage, never crash a car,…


  • a love story

    men cherish compliments like shinies off that show what was it called ‍ ‍The Shiny Show – CBeebies ‍ sometimes the emotional equivalent of a ball of scrunched up tinfoil…


  • cashmoney

    I swear long term qualifications like degrees, they’re just a test to see how well you can concentrate on something -trust me I can do this shit but I’m not…


  • litter

    This shouldn’t make me feel genuine sympathy because we’re talking about a hunk of metal, an object, with no feelings. ‍ Satellites are operational (they live) for around 10 years.…